I hate facebook.
This morning I was done.
I quit.
I've had some issues with the online network fascination as of late, but today it drew the last straw. I think it's snooping. They should call it Snoopbook.
So anyways.... this morning, I wake up, and what do I do? Check the weather, my gmail, and then facebook of course. I'm guilty of this ritual too. Like do I really need to know what my 350some "friends" ate for breakfast, or how their night was?? No! But I check anyways....
I come to see a congratulatory wall post.... what now? She had her baby? I didn't get a call..... I quickly go to check my phone for missed calls, a voice mail, anything? Nope. But now I know that my friend had a baby girl sometime today or yesterday, I have yet to know the details... I'm waiting for the phone call! It's my own stupid fault, if I'm looking forward to this call, why am I checking facebook?
So that's why I'm done. Facebook is a lazy way of staying "connected" with your so called friends. It's probably a fact that only 20 out of 400 are your real friends anyways. A friendship should be more than reading their updates and being reminded by facebook that it's their birthday and leaving them a happy birthday wall post which ends up being 1 of 100 and some.
I think about one of Ryan's aunts, she's amazing. For our anniversary, we got a card in the mail, on the day! In it read "Happy 3rd Anniversary, May God bless you." I was so impressed. She even knew 3 years! We get a card from her on our birthdays too, on the day, never fails. People like her are rare nowadays. She's a good example of how we should all try to be... a little more genuine in our friends/family members lives. Making the effort to keep in touch or really show you care, or remember a special date. Without being reminded by facebook.
So there's my rant.
It's over between me and facebook.
Thank you for putting into words why I hate it so much and why I've also refused to stop using it- Mostly the part about all these people who don't really care but secretly want a lot of birthday wishes when their day comes I guess.
ReplyDeleteNot from me! If I really know them and care I'll CALL them or even a CARD directly to them.
Thank you!!! haha
Yuck. I hate it too.
ReplyDeleteA good friend of mine recently had to go out of town at the last minute for a family emergency, but I didn't know it at the time... I couldn't get ahold of her, but when I finally did I said "Where have you been? I was worried!" and all she said was, "Didn't you see my Facebook status?" Um, no, actually - I didn't think to log onto Facebook to find out what happened to my friend. Grrrrrrr.
Way to go! This is a big part of why we refuse to get it.
ReplyDeleteUnless you're getting emails or messages from people you're already staying connected with anyway, they're sort of empty feeling.
Wow, well said!
ReplyDeleteRyan´s aunt seems to be so sweet. You´re right, this has become rare, sadly.
But abandoning facebook is the right step :-)
Ah and I pledge from now on to write more real letters!!
Wow. I totally understand that!
ReplyDeleteNow, don't get me wrong, I definitely have the whole facebook/myspace thing. It's fine for making new online friends (I like the fact that I'll now be able to stay in touch with my RVA classmates and photography friends). But as for my real-life, personal friends...I do try to make sure I keep a real-life, personal relationship with them. I don't remember the last time I got a hand-written letter or card in the mail. It's always e-vites, text messages, e-cards, etc. I hate that!
Everyone is looking for a more efficient (coughlazycough) way to do things...and it's making everyone less personable. Which is why I feel everyone is so mean and rude nowadays! :(
i agree. i only have like 30 or so friends on facebook, and the majority of them are my extended family, but i really hate facebook too. i have the app on my iphone, so i log into that once a week or so to see what my cousins and aunts/uncles are up to, but really, that's it.
ReplyDeleteand i agree about the card thing. people are so rude these days [myself included... i have good intentions, but let's face it, i never sent out paisley's birth announcements or even thank you cards for our wedding!]
<3katie
gosh, you are so right on!! i've been thinking these exact things for a while now......im glad to see im not the only one. it's so strange to see society change- at the pace that we have seen it- in such a short amount of time. {and were not that old!!!!}
ReplyDeletemy mom is amazing at sending cards- handwritten- and that truly is an art that is fading. this post inspires me....to gte out my colored paper, stamps and pens. Someone will get a note from me soon....
p.s bummer to hear about the situation with your friend. seriously!!!???
Oh ew. You just said it perfectly. I've had issues with Internet communication for some time now, as well as with text messaging. Relationships have become really impersonal, if you ask me. I don't like learning about important events in my friends' lives via Facebook or even via text message. Sure, it's a nice way to keep informed about some acquaintances, but that's it. I mean, I found out about a dear friend's divorce through her Facebook status. I have friends that would rather sit online and talk via Facebook or AOL Instant Messenger than meet up with for a cup of coffee. I feel like Facebook has brought the whole popularity contest to adults.
ReplyDeleteIt's sad. Sigh.
Oh i agree...whole heartedly.
ReplyDeletei hate having the feeling of someone who you condsider a true friend only communicating with you through facebook. it seems so impersonal, and like you said, lazy. i wish people would understand this, and stop letting it consume their everyday lives.
it's ok for maybe a little fun, but way too easy to let it take the place of normal communication.
where will it end?:)
good for you, i wish i was that strong.
ReplyDeletei had a falling out with a friend who would continuously post awful comments on my boyfriend's facebook. i was so sick of it that i deleted her from my friends so that i wouldn't have to be notified of it. why be friends on facebook when we're not really friends anyway, right? well apparently that was the biggest form of public humiliation to her. she sits on facebook all day so of course she noticed immediately. after i refused to argue about it through text messages, i told her i only wanted to speak in person or at least on the phone. her reply was (in a text message) "can you at least add me back on facebook until we talk?"
some people take facebook waaaay too seriously.
i TOTALLY agree with you. I have facebook and will keep using it because since I'm in college its convenient. usually i use facebook to joke with people i talk to daily anyway, etc. but i think its ridiculous when facebook takes over your life so much so that you don't call your friends when you have exciting news. props to you holly for deleting your account!
ReplyDeleteYep, totally agree, I've been considering for a long time trimming down my "friends" list to include people that I actually talk to or have a relationship with, and stop snooping all my old high school classmates, friends of friends, etc. I mean, yeah it was fun at first to find everyone, but it's been 2 years, it's time to let go. Thanks for the extra push! (I won't stop using it completely though, I can't go cold turkey, haha)
ReplyDeletesnoopbook... that made me laugh :)
ReplyDeletei hate it too! (*cough* but i still have it)
love you holly :)
I've been debating on whether to get rid of mine. I have been streamlining my "friends" list, though. And now I don't feel so guilty about denying people that I don't really know at all. It used to be a great way to stay in touch with friends, especially over school breaks when everyone scattered. But now, everyone and their grandmothers (literally) are on. And the more people that seem to be on, the more unnecessary drama seems to occur. Good for you for giving it up!
ReplyDeleteI personally think I got a lil too addicted to fb. BUT i do love this post. cards are so personal. And handwritten sentiments on lovely stationery(ary)? are soooo wonderful! thats why im going to stock up on so many pretty kinds before i leave for college in the fall! I heart letters and notes! And one way to get them is to send them! You'd love my dorm decor btw. I'm thinking about starting a blog and posting all kinds of decor ive got and am getting!Anyway, also would like to share that our church is in our 10th week of revival! its going on for a WHOLE year. very powerful! God's been healing people and blessing them left and right, including me! Love you holly!
ReplyDeletepeAce.
mAdi
I totally agree with you Holly!! While I quite like fb, I can totally understand why you'd be upset at something like that!! (P.S. So happy for them by the way!!)
ReplyDeleteI personally think that this world has gotten way to dependant on computers/internet/email/etc.
Like where's the art in letter writting anymore? As a kid I LOVED getting mail, now the only mail I get is from billing companies.
Good for you for taking a stand!!
Agree 100% but sadly that not only occurs with facebook it happens with the blog thing too. I hate discovering my "friend's" plans by reading their blogs when they could simply tell me the news, it's like, why the REST of the world has to know and you can't tell me personally if were FRIENDS.It makes you feel like...just another person rather than having a special place, you know like it happens when you share something with someone?
ReplyDeleteP.S.
ReplyDeleteI refuse to get facebook :)
I rather have Myspace, which is technically the same but the only use I find lately on it is to discover new bands & know about their gigs and stuff.
:) I never had one and now my 50 year old mother does! And people try to look for me throw her's! I can't handle it lol
ReplyDeletei agree, facebook (twitter, texts, etc.) is making everyone lazy about communicating - myself included. my grandma writes letters all the time and i'm trying to take after her.
ReplyDeletewow! that really made me open my eyes. (which has been happening a lot lately! ha!) i've never thought of it that way. thanks lady!
ReplyDeleteok so if you want to keep in touch my email is jari.spry@gmail.com
xo!
I agree. But I think it is just certain people who are on there that are like that. People find it easier than calling 50 of their friends to tell them something. But still agree that close friends should always be called first and then facebook it. I would cry if something like that happened too. I think I found out about my bf having a baby was from a friend of a friend and was totally upset. People have used technology as an excuse to not write/call people that mean something to them. Personally I love sending cards and packages to my friends on their birthday. I love calling and talking to people and don't think that people do it enough.
ReplyDeleteI will miss you on facebook...but I know to always find you here and hope someday we can become friends! If you would like, e-mail me your address...I would like to send you something. :)
P.S. Sorry this is long and obscure and random :)
-Kimi
I never got face book for this exact reason. My grandparents & parents have it and i don't. Its too impersonal for me. and i don't want it to become a routine for me. and also i know i will snoop its just better out of my life. I am sorry you have to go through this.
ReplyDeleteRight on!!!
ReplyDeleteI am so with you.
ReplyDeletewow. well put. i was hesitant for some reason despite people constantly raving about it, but after reading your post i now know why.
ReplyDeleteAt the risk of being shouted down for going against the grain - I disagree...
ReplyDeleteI'm a mum of 2 special needs kids and barely have time to speak to the people I do see in person. If there is a way to let my friends know something about me that I haven't got time to write down in 20 personal notes then I'm all for it.
Not to mention the fact that I live in Sydney while all my family and some of my friends live in Victoria (different state for those who don't know Australia very well) I even have some school friends who've moved to Darwin, Perth etc. (different corners of our country). Some I hadn't been able to keep connected with despite our closeness at school simply due to distance. I am now in regular contact with them again.
I got a birthday wish of one of them the other day and she commented that she thought of me on the 11 March every year. I said I always thought of her to on her birthday (coming up on the 23rd). How can you knock something that has reconnected a long lost friendship like that. I don't know if I'll ever get to see her in person again, but I can keep in touch every day even if we don't have time for a chat in real time.
You are all intitled to your opinions but you all sound lucky enough to be within easy reach of those you love. I just thought I'd show you a side of it for people who aren't so lucky.
Cheers!
ps. love your blog Holly